I have three sons, ages 13, 11 and 9, and one thing that constantly brings me joy is when they sing songs that they know I love. Especially when they’re songs that are older than them. For example, my 11 year old will randomly break out with ”Paint It Black” by The Rolling Stones, and we will scream the lyrics together. He understands that his dad is a music snob, so he will probably only love the most important songs.
This is why my 9 year old knows the words to not only “Her Town Too” by James Taylor, but also “Psycho Killer” by Talking Heads. The 11 year old has an affinity for Yacht Rock, so he sings along with Jerry Rafferty and Rupert Holmes. I pray that they hold onto the level of snobbery that I have, to keep the good separated from the garbage.
However (there’s always a however, right?), being on the planet for half a century has shown me that time will eventually tell that everything we think is the greatest shit ever might just actually be shit.
I grew up in the 70s and 80s, and as I grew up my life revolved around 3 things: food, clothing and music (and girls, but more on that some other time). But for now, I have seen both sides of the matrix. The following is the first in a three-part series about things that were once fancied by tym, but now not so much.
Burgers – There was a time when hamburgers ruled my world. McDonalds, Burger King, Rally’s, I would take any or all of these at any time. Now, my body will literally curse me out (I hear his voice in my head – he’s British) if/when I even think about doing this to myself. Ironically, the only burger I can consume without some sort of violent gastric upheaval is White Castle. That’s saying a lot. Many people say that WC makes them sick, but I find them calming. And quite onion-ey.
Taco Bell – I used to, on many occasions, leave my house at 11:30pm, on like a Tuesday, go to Taco Bell, order a 10-pack of tacos, go home, consume said food with a bottle of soda, go to sleep and get up the next day for work. With no issue. If you try to offer me Taco Bell today, you will be met with the icy glare of an assassin, followed by an onslaught of foul language that Samuel L. Jackson might find offensive. ‘Nuff said.
Pizza* - Note the asterisk. I can say, without flinching that, aside from chicken wings, pizza is my favorite dish. There was a time when ANY pizza was my favorite dish. From toast or cracker pizza made with Ragu Pizza Quick sauce in my mom’s oven, to grade school pizza in the aluminum containers, to greasy heat-lamp pizza from the gas station, to Giordano’s deep-dish from Chicago, if you called it pizza, I’d eat it. Nowadays, I need (a) wood-fire cooked pizza, (b) handmade with actual pizza dough at my house, (c) authentic New York-style, foldable slices with slightly tough dough, (d) Dayton, Ohio thin-crust Mom’s Big Cheese from Cassano’s, or (e), the holy grail of pizza, the Godfather’s combo from Godfather’s Pizza.
*Note - My wife and children took me to Godfather’s one year for Father’s day, and it was the greatest thing ever. I took pictures, Duran Duran was playing on their jukebox… I was 17 again, only with a better girlfriend and maybe 75 more pounds. And 3 little people who look like me…
I’m sorry – what were we talking about? I was having a moment. #verklempt
Thank you for your time. I now have to drive to Dayton and get a pizza from Godfather’s. Is gas still under $2.00 per gallon?